Prove. Him. Wrong.

Somewhere Max Hall is smiling.

A lot.

Max endured a lengthy media rape thanks to his post-game comments following last year's BYU-Utah game.

"I don't like Utah. In fact, I hate them. I hate everything about them. I hate their program, I hate their fans, I hate everything ... I think the whole university, their fans, and their organization is classless."

Calling an entire organization classless  is tomfoolery (especially considering the word classless refers to a society in which there are no social distinctions, not to a person who lacks class), but the point I want to make is this: BYU and Utah have engaged in two sporting events since those comments, and in both games a member of the Utah team has vindicated Max's words with actions worthy of the word "classless" (incorrect usage notwithstanding).

Let's examine the occurrences:

Game 1: BYU vs Utah, Basketball, Jan. 30, 2010

BYU squelched a late run by the Utes and had the game in hand with under a couple of minutes to play. That's when Ute shooting guard Marshall Henderson decided to get his non-shooting hand involved in the game. Frustrated by the defense of Cougar counterpart Jackson Emery, Henderson swung. The punch was weak, and so was Emery's fall, but the fact is that Henderson lost his cool, blew a nut, and did the "classy" thing of swinging at an unsuspecting player.

Game 2: BYU vs Utah, Basketball, March 3, 2010

BYU dominated Utah on the latter's home court, evoking this post game conversation between Ute coach Jim Boylen and a local sportswriter.

Listen carefully starting at second 43 of the clip.
Did you notice the part where the reporter requests that Boylen, "Show some class?"
Could a more redeeming phrase been used?

Not surprisingly, there was little to no uproar following the actions of Boylen or Henderson. Whereas Max's comments inspired 10,000 Facebook status updates, a slew of t-shirts, and a most certain 80% increase in beer sales at next year's BYU-Utah football game, the punch and comment from the U made nay a ripple in the social or media pond. Where every non-sport watching girl at my work had heard Max's comments, not a one had seen Henderson's punch or heard Boylen's spastic remarks. Interesting, the scrutiny that standards invoke.

Back to the point at hand. Max Hall is the all-time winningest QB at a university known specifically for great QB play. He is the second all-time leader in passing yards at the Y. He is the owner of a conference championship, and two bowl game victories. And now his most mocked words have been vindicated. The Utes had two quick chances to prove Hall's claim that they were classless wrong, and they failed miserably.

So smile Max Hall. You deserve to.

One Third Through

The first time we broke up, the red-headed lover didn't take it too well (neither did I, but this story isn't about me. Well, at least not directly). And girls, when heartbroken, tend to seek comfort in one (or more) of the following devices:

a) Eating ice cream
b) Burning pictures of their old fling
c) Reading Twilight

The red-headed lover, to her everlasting credit, pursued another route in search of comfort: she watched hours and hours of old-school BYU football clips on youtube and Byu-Tv.

If ever there were a sign that me and Brooke were supposed to be together, that was it.

And somehow I still blew it.

How I ever let go of a girl like that (possibly the only girl like that) is beyond my ability to comprehend.
Yes, yes,you don't have to tell me. I know. I'm an idiot.

So what if we'd rather kiss the cougar statue outside LaVell's stadium than each other?

I let go of a girl that a) is hot, and b) likes BYU football as much as I do. Those are just two of the many things I miss about her (see Brooke's Blog for further detail).

She's been gone six months, as of today. Incredibly, as her time away has increased, so too have my feelings for her. Sadly, and rightly, the same can't be said for her.

I suppose there is good news, though. At least I still have 365 days to figure out a way to win her back once she returns.

I'm open to suggestions. Appearance improvement, date ideas, charming jokes, the ability to enjoy chick flicks. I'll take advice on practically anything.  Just don't suggest hair regrowth formula.

Already tried it.

Verbal versus Bubble

In the eternal search for female companionship, the impeccable Morgan Grimes once wisely outlined the two approaches a man can utilize in such a quest. While trying to help his best friend Chuck recover his dream girl from the clutches of another man, he explains the difference between the verbal and bubble approaches. It's a beautiful clip (and it only took me an hour to cut with movie maker).

Verbal vs bubble. Man and women are very familiar with these two skill sets. On the one side lives the bulging, log-chopping, scruff-chinned man. The other side provides the comical, witty, chic-nerd. Both types of men have their pros and cons, with girls being attracted to six packs and jokes, and repelled by stick-figure arms or the daily wearing of gym shorts. Did it all start with Beauty and the Beast? Sure, the Beast was all-man, muscular, capable of "filling out a pair of slacks", but the fellow wasn't much for chatter. Wit, charm, charisma - these were the missing traits that Belle could only hope for her dream man to develop. On the reverse side, Friends gave us the exploits of Ross Gellar and his attempts to woo dream girl Rachel Green. Not much of a man when compared to his pal Joey Tribbiani, what Ross lacked in awesome bubble power he made up for with his verbal abilities.

I bring this topic to your attention only because I am in a verbal versus bubble battle at this very moment. That's right, I like a girl. Sadly, I don't bring a lot of muscle to the table. At least I don't compared to my competitor. A man with trees for arms and bricks for abs is the one I must vanquish in the fight for the current girl of my dreams.

For this girl to climb out of my dreams and into my actual life will require my verbal skills to be at their finest level. So for this I turn to Steve Rushin. A writer for Sports Illustrated, he knows how to wordsmith. Boy does he ever.

I guess that's really the whole point to this measly post, now that I'm here, to link to my favorite Rushin rambling.

This one here:

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/inside_game/steve_rushin/news/2003/02/21/air_and_space/

Oh yeah, and to memorialize that clip of Morgan.

Fellow verbalists! We have our exemplars. Now let's follow.